You realize no matter how much you tried, how much you hoped, how much you cried, your mother was not capable of loving you. Not the way a mother should love her child.
Of course, it has come to me late in life, this realization, but my love for her does not waiver. She is my mom and I will always love her. I just know now, there is nothing I can do, or say that will change that. She not mentally capable of this.